Best Movies of All Time

This is the list of my favorite movies of all times. Later, I will put them in ranking order.

12 Monkeys - There is something awesome about this movie that I don't understand.

Godfather I and II. (Didn't like III very much)

The Great Escape

War of the Worlds (original; the remake sucked)

Apocalypse Now (original; the redux sucked, and it INFURATES me that whenever they show Apocalypse Now on TV, its always that HORRIBLE redux. News flash: The reason that they edited-out all of that footage is because it sucked. You are not getting something "extra" by viewing all of that disorganized junk. You are just viewing a bunch of irrelevant crap that ruins the movie. And why did they remove the GREAT music at the end of the movie, when everything was blowing up while they showed the credits? That is GREAT.

World Trade Center. A profound emotional experience.

Terminators I & II. (T III sucked). Lets face it, Ahnoold is getting too old and respectable. When hes says "Aisle be back", it sounds like he's running for re-election. Yawn. Don't remind us.

Star Wars (but ALL of the sequels have sucked)

On the subject of Sequel Theory, I've been developing Orf's Law of Decreasing Entertaineousness. I was hoping to publish it and get a grant: The law states that there is a 95% probability that the entertaineousness of any given sequel is no more than 50% of the immediately preceeding movie. In other words, the odds are 20-to-1 against a sequel being any more than 50% as entertaining as the movie directly preceeding it (which may also be a sequel). This is a recursive mathematical law.

Therefore, the odds are also 20-to-1 against: A sequel III being any more than 25% as entertaining as the original, a sequel IV being more than 12.5% as entertaining as the original, a Sequel V being any more than 6.25%, a sequel VI being more than 3.1%, etc.

This explains why most III sequels are horrible, and most V or VI sequels are bad enough to induce vomiting. They can be downright painful to watch. If watched frequently enough, especially in one sitting, they can even cause death. It is entirely possible that this is what killed Anna Nicole Smith.

Consider the endless "Star Wars" garbage. The original Star Wars was fantastic, but the most recent sequels are, as mathematically shown by Ork's Law, only about .0000125% as entertaining as the original. In fact, the entertaineousness of Star Wars sequels, at this point, is beginning to approach negative infinity. Once a movie reaches an entertaineousness of negative infinity, the consequences can be drastic: Viewers will start uncontrollably vomiting up their popcorn, and start laughing hysterically at all the wrong parts, and, as in the possible case of Anna Nicole, even die.

So you have to be very careful about going to see sequels. That is why I am not going to see Rocky XLVII, or whatever it is. Soon, they will have to use scientific notation to show the sequel number of movies in the Rocky or Star Wars chain: Star Wars 10 to the 43rd power, or Rocky 1.543 times 10 to the 63rd power. These movies can actually induce negative entropy, thus not only killing the viewer, but actually causing him to vaporize!

I will list more of my favorite movies later, as I think of them.

Draft 1: 2/9/07