Would Republicans Bet their Balls Against Drilling Disasters?
I find it somewhat annoying that most of these vociferous Republicans screaming for offshore drilling live in land-locked states. Heck, if you live in Colorado or Illinois, what difference does it make to YOU if there is a massive Exxon-Valdez-style disaster on the Florida coast?
As a Floridian, it makes a BIG difference to me. There is very little advantage to Floridians to do offshore oil drilling. That is why the last Governor of Florida, a notorious tree-hugging commie named Jeb Bush, was solidly behind prohibiting offshore drilling.
The Florida economy, and the people of Florida, have a HUGE stake in keeping the Florida Coasts clean. Even ignoring environmentalist issues, there is a HUGE amount of money at stake.
Rich tourists come to Florida from all over the USA and all over the world. People like Donald Trump spend millions, or even tens of millions of dollars to build oceanfront estates in Palm Beach, Boca Raton, and other places. Retirees flock to the state from all over the USA.
And why do they come here? Beautiful beaches, crystal clear waters, fresh ocean breezes, world-class sport fishing, even bird-watching.
In 2005, Florida got hit by Hurricane Wilma. At one point, when Wilma was out in the Gulf of Mexico, it had ramped up to a record-breaking 180 MPH. Call that "category 6". "Category 5" is total nuclear destruction. Don't ask me what "category 6" is.
But John McCain, in his infinite wisdom, says that the offshore drilling rigs would hold up OK against hurricanes. Apparently most survived Katrina.
Sorry to interject fact here, but the key to destruction in a hurricane is how far you are from Ground Zero, the "eye wall". So those rigs that "survived Katrina" may have been FAR from the Ground Zero, only picking up category 1 or 2 winds.
A 180 MPH hurricane means SUSTAINED WINDS of 180 MPH which could last for HOURS, or even DAYS. Think about driving your car at 180 MPH and sticking your head out the window. Maybe you could do that for a couple seconds, but how about for 10 hours? There would be nothing left of you.
An offshore oil rig would not only be exposed to 180 MPH winds, but also a literal MOUNTAIN of ocean swells. The tidal surge would reach 25 feet, and the speed of the current could get up to 100 MPH or more.
Do you really think that some intricate contraption like an oil platform is going to be able to stand 180 MPH winds plus a sustained mountain of additional water moving at 100 MPH? That hurricane would rip the oil rigs pipes out by the sockets. There would be nothing left of it.
That would live the pumps pumping into the ocean for at least a day or two before anybody could even get NEAR the site to fix it. Plus, how are they going to go a mile down in the water to fix the kind of HUGE damage that could take place?
So I have a modest proposal for McCain and the Republicans. You say that you REALLY BELIEVE that your offshore oil rigs would survive a Category 6 hurricane without it being an environmental disaster?
OK. Guarantee it with a pound of your flesh. That's right. Guarantee it with old Prince Ferdinand of Wanger down there. The guy who stands rigidly at attention when the Swedish Bikini team marches by. Sir William, the Duke of Dork.
And if there is an environmental disaster caused by offshore oil drilling, us Floridians could expect that most of the Republican leadership would be willing to undergo surgical castration.
That's right. All the big mouths who are now promising that offshore drilling is so safe: John McCain, George Bush, Newt Gingrich, Shawn Hannity, Bill O, et al.
If all of these Republican Biggies would be willing to sign a sworn statement, in blood, that they would undergo surgical castration if their promise that no harm would come of offshore drilling proved true, then I might consider changing my opinion.
Kind of a nice way to keep all these Politicians Motor-mouths honest. They might think twice about making promises that are not realistic.
Draft 1: 8/6/08
As a Floridian, it makes a BIG difference to me. There is very little advantage to Floridians to do offshore oil drilling. That is why the last Governor of Florida, a notorious tree-hugging commie named Jeb Bush, was solidly behind prohibiting offshore drilling.
The Florida economy, and the people of Florida, have a HUGE stake in keeping the Florida Coasts clean. Even ignoring environmentalist issues, there is a HUGE amount of money at stake.
Rich tourists come to Florida from all over the USA and all over the world. People like Donald Trump spend millions, or even tens of millions of dollars to build oceanfront estates in Palm Beach, Boca Raton, and other places. Retirees flock to the state from all over the USA.
And why do they come here? Beautiful beaches, crystal clear waters, fresh ocean breezes, world-class sport fishing, even bird-watching.
In 2005, Florida got hit by Hurricane Wilma. At one point, when Wilma was out in the Gulf of Mexico, it had ramped up to a record-breaking 180 MPH. Call that "category 6". "Category 5" is total nuclear destruction. Don't ask me what "category 6" is.
But John McCain, in his infinite wisdom, says that the offshore drilling rigs would hold up OK against hurricanes. Apparently most survived Katrina.
Sorry to interject fact here, but the key to destruction in a hurricane is how far you are from Ground Zero, the "eye wall". So those rigs that "survived Katrina" may have been FAR from the Ground Zero, only picking up category 1 or 2 winds.
A 180 MPH hurricane means SUSTAINED WINDS of 180 MPH which could last for HOURS, or even DAYS. Think about driving your car at 180 MPH and sticking your head out the window. Maybe you could do that for a couple seconds, but how about for 10 hours? There would be nothing left of you.
An offshore oil rig would not only be exposed to 180 MPH winds, but also a literal MOUNTAIN of ocean swells. The tidal surge would reach 25 feet, and the speed of the current could get up to 100 MPH or more.
Do you really think that some intricate contraption like an oil platform is going to be able to stand 180 MPH winds plus a sustained mountain of additional water moving at 100 MPH? That hurricane would rip the oil rigs pipes out by the sockets. There would be nothing left of it.
That would live the pumps pumping into the ocean for at least a day or two before anybody could even get NEAR the site to fix it. Plus, how are they going to go a mile down in the water to fix the kind of HUGE damage that could take place?
So I have a modest proposal for McCain and the Republicans. You say that you REALLY BELIEVE that your offshore oil rigs would survive a Category 6 hurricane without it being an environmental disaster?
OK. Guarantee it with a pound of your flesh. That's right. Guarantee it with old Prince Ferdinand of Wanger down there. The guy who stands rigidly at attention when the Swedish Bikini team marches by. Sir William, the Duke of Dork.
And if there is an environmental disaster caused by offshore oil drilling, us Floridians could expect that most of the Republican leadership would be willing to undergo surgical castration.
That's right. All the big mouths who are now promising that offshore drilling is so safe: John McCain, George Bush, Newt Gingrich, Shawn Hannity, Bill O, et al.
If all of these Republican Biggies would be willing to sign a sworn statement, in blood, that they would undergo surgical castration if their promise that no harm would come of offshore drilling proved true, then I might consider changing my opinion.
Kind of a nice way to keep all these Politicians Motor-mouths honest. They might think twice about making promises that are not realistic.
Draft 1: 8/6/08
posted by Jack W. Orf | 2:42 PM
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