GOD HAS NO WRATH IN FEBRUARY

Inevitably, some Evangeloonie loony-tunes are informing devastated New Orleans hurricane victims that they are suffering this fate because they are being punished by God. Suddenly, after 100 years of Mardi Gras, God has suddenly decided to punish New Orleanians for tossing beads to female flashers.

A few reality checks: First, hundreds of thousands of devout Christians on the Gulf Coast have lost homes and livlihood. Are they being punished too?

Second, hurricanes only occur between June and November. Does God never get wrathful between December and May? If Hurricanes are caused by the wrath of God, how come God never sends any in the winter time? Is he hibernating? Does he never get angry in February? March? April?

Why do Evangeloonies have this need to give a spiritual definition to purely physical phenomena?

SET TERM LIMITS ON SUPREME COURT JUSTICES

We are now going to have Pretty Boy Floyd as Chief Justice for the next 30 years. What does he think? Who knows. He takes the 5th on all of his opinions. He is a man who has no opinions whatsoever except that he believes in Justice (which is a good thing).

However, why then do the Evangeloonies like him so much? The Evangeloonies don't like ANYONE who doesn't believe exactly as they do, so it's pretty certain that Pretty Boy is going to be a major stealth Conservative on the Supreme court.

I really believe that Supreme Court justices should be ELECTED for 12 year terms. This business of picking 50 year-old conservatives and having them linger for 30 years, like a bad fart, is a little ridiculous. We're going to have Pretty Boy exercising "judicial activism" on the right for the next 30 years.

And another thing. Why is it not important to explore what a court nominee believes? That is really the most important thing, beyond the fact that the have an understanding of law.

Maybe if we had justices elected for 12 year terms then we wouldn't have a Supreme Court that picks our Presidents for us, like they pick their nose.

And now we have another right-wing wing-dinger. Aleyoop Alito. Good-bye abortions, hello massive overpopulation. You know, if all these right-to-lifers love massive overpopulation so much, why don't they all move to India and China? Then they could see firsthand the wonderfulness of having 400 million people who live on less than a dollar a day. Gee, maybe America can someday be that overpopulated and all the right-to-lifers will be happy.

Then Pope Adolf can speak to this sweating, stinking horde of a million spectators listening to his every word. "Tell us, oh Holy Pope, how we can pop those prophilactics and stop those abortions so that there can be billions and trillions of stinking, greedy, filthy, stupid humanoids stinking up God's once beautiful planet."

But hey, they'll have Jayzuz. What could be more important than Jayzuz?