DUPLEX The "Toxic Assets"

What genius came up with the phrase "toxic assets"? It's called "collateral", genius boys, and it's about time to use it for something.

Think about it for a minute. A couple hundred miles from America, in Haiti, you have hundreds of thousands of people living in cardboard boxes. They have no electricity or running water, and a lot of them are starving.

Here in America, we have hundreds of thousands of homes, each of which is worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, sitting empty. Meanwhile, large numbers of Americans enter the ranks of the homeless because they can't afford to buy one of the hundreds of thousands of homes that is sitting empty.

Helloooo-oooh. Duh. Does anyone else think that this is pretty dumb? As in D.U.M. dumb?

Washington wants to solve the problem by giving hundreds of billions of dollars to the guys on Wall Street who built all of these dumb houses that no one can afford.

Dumb gets dummer.

Here's a refreshing idea. Rather than spending trillions of the taxpayers money to eliminate "toxic debt" (what the Hell is THAT), why not actually USE these hundreds of billions of dollars worth of housing?

Here's a few things that you could use these hundreds of billions of dollars worth of homes for. 1. Housing. Nobody can afford these single-family behemoths that the banking geniuses have created. Here's a hint: DUPLEX them! One family can't afford the damn thing? Well maybe TWO families can. That's a lot better than the IDIOTIC idea of wasting taxpayer money on weatherproofing them, or greenisizing them.

Yeah, DUPLEX 'EM. Still a wall and door in there and, voila, you got a DUPLEX. If it's still too expensive, duplex the damn thing again! Maybe FOUR families can afford the piece of junk! At least taxpayers won't have to pay for it!!!

Other uses: Re-zone the community and use individual, foreclosed homes for stores, warehouses, classrooms, nursing facilities, health clinics, restaurants, motels, and apartments.

"Toxic waste" indeed! There is hundreds of billions of dollars in good housing just going to waste simply because nobody can afford the ridiculous prices that builders wanted.

Rather than constantly crying in their beer about "toxic assets", it's time for the financial industry along with government to get off their lazy asses and do something with the collateral that they have acquired.